This is part 3 of a 5 part series titled: The Boarding School Dilemma – Balancing Mission and Family – The Parents’ Viewpoint. Part 1 laid out the dilemma of the issue and how few parents have discussed the experience with their children. This was followed by Part 2 that drilled down into the Ubangi Academy (UBAC), which was the school we attended, along with the dormitory facilities, routines, and culture. This episode focuses on the Parents. How did they handle and reconcile with sending their children away? I interview several parents: one who was a UBAC attendee, then as an adult, sent his children to the dorm, thus experiencing both sides of the equation. The second interviewee sent his kids away to UBAC then became the dorm parent for a period of time. And the third interviewee, Anonymous, also shares some viewpoints. Most parents grieved and struggled with sending their children away, and prayed for the best. Many made extra efforts for spending quality family time during vacations. Others tried to visit mid-term when they could. But all parents knew it was a sacrifice that would impact their family, to serve in Congo, while sending their children away to boarding school. In Part 4, kids are interviewed and you will hear from them about the experience. And the final episode will be a wrap up and take-away of what we can learn about all of this and how to move forward. Special thanks to Kim Cone, Jim Snyder, and Anonymous for being interviewed for this episode. Thanks too to Ruth Hill for her comments and insights. Also, appreciation is extended to those who returned the surveys as numerous responses were used in this episode to round it out.
**Rated in 2024 to the TOP 25 Best “Life Stories” Themed Podcasts Worldwide – https://blog.feedspot.com/life_stories_podcasts/
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Another good episode. Thanks, Jeff.
Thank you, Jeff.
‘Farewells..role of prayer..be as real as we could be..communication..finding God faithful..Talk about it.’
Radical lives are rarely easy anytime to process and communicate. But, you did it humbly and kind.
The Selenga’s are an amazing couple, I agree. Translation into French is an interesting thought. Pastor Selenga thinks outside the box for the well being of the church.
I did go to school in CAR where Cones and Hockings were
for one semester before God graciously opened up a place for me at UBAC. Dorcas and Mark were there.
Jeff
Nice job and very interesting to hear from those who were dorm kids, then the ones who do the sending, and dorm parents. On a positive note I loved the Selengi example, I’ve never heard what the Congolese might have thought of the parents and kids sacrifice, it almost made my early childhood experience worth it. Another area of agreement was parents saying the education was excellent, I agree. Lastly my parents made my vacations fun and adventuresome with trips to Kala sandbars and lake Kwada and Bangui , hunting and more
I have a different perspective than those parents you mention on their survey saying that personal growth and spiritual growth was excellent. Early childhood personal growth ages 7-11 for me and most of my ‘friends’ I would rate as an F or very poor . At that age developmentally we all know friends and abstract thinking is not possible and the whole experience for most was frightening and lacked parental and emotional support so personal growth was almost impossible until later years. In regards to spiritual growth (but only after age 11) I would give the dorm experience an F for about 1/2 of the dorm kids, a C for 1/4 and an A for the remaining 1/4. As proof would be that 1/2 my friends from that era (25 out of 50) are no longer believers with some actively opposed. And those I have talked to say it was their dorm experience that led them in that direction. The dorm was a ‘conformity’ spirituality which meant for many it was never internalized so many today view that experience thru legalistic eyes. And many want nothing to do with Christianity that requires sacrifice children at such a young age . I see that point altho I was was able to also in later in life work with a counselor to internalize many of the traditional orthodox beliefs.
Lastly, I found the whole sacrifice idea not fitting the reality of those days. 4 years (from age 7-11) is not a huge amount of time to dedicate to solutions other than boarding schools. There is little harm done educationally in early years, I did all my independent reading at the dorm anyway with miss Blakeway.. Homeschooling, weekly radio calls with parents, assigning an adult to each child from the dorm, protections from physical, vverbal, and sexual abuse are not too much to ask and would eliminate the tears and anguish from both kids and children. ( I too observed sexual abuse, im finding it was more prevalent than I initially thought. And I hate to say this but it is reality, after age 6 my parents (and dare I say yours as well) , all significant parenting stopped. I was parented for. 9 months out of the year by others, and those 9 months were when I needed it most , the other 3 months were vacations and avoiding the topic of the dorm and trying to make things light to avoid the tears… and I was ‘parented’ badly at the dorm by adults and friends (not blaming them tho they couldn’t help it) with no emotional connection or warmth…..and it wasn’t until high school that I made true friendships ( not sure it is possible at a younger age 7-11 ). FINALLY!!! You know who you are and you were a God send to me! GOD Bless you! You were and still are the BEST!